Beach Babe

About an hour from my house is a really great place--the beach. I live near the Gulf of Mexico, so when I say "beach," don't think white sand and blue water. But I could care less. I love every single thing about the beach close by. Momma was afraid that I would not like the sand. She was wrong. In fact, I positioned myself right smack at the water's edge to have a perfect line of sight to some bathing beauties. Look to my right for the ladies.

But Momma wouldn't stop taking pictures. Shocking, I know. She still doesn't understand that I cannot get my mack on when she is two feet away talking about how adorable I am. I need to get this in check now or she will still be using her spit to wash off my face when I am headed to college. I tried to crawl over and take her camera so I could chuck it into the water. I heard that salt water can really mess up those things.

But Momma was too fast. So rather than fight it, I practiced my model poses. No one can resist a man with a bit of a gut and some chubby thighs, right?

The only drawback to the beach was dealing with the sand after I got out of the water. It was everywhere. First time having sand in the nether regions--not a fan. It gave me a whole new meaning of the term "beach bum."